17th September 2008

yesterday i didnt go to school again... i spent most of the time at home but i did get a hold of myself after the great shock about AIG downfalls. well, jasmine cam to my place after her class and we had a long chat... and fun too... after she left i received a call from ashiq to break fast together...

well after asking permission from my dad, i got ready and we went to geylang bazaar to do a little bit of shopping and eating and enjoying... he bought me a new shawl... pinkish purple... cute... but i dont really like the color... well i cant say it to him but its the tot that counts... so i accdepted the gift with all my heart.... i gave him a 5 inch songkok in return...

i really miss shopping for azahar... and i know ashiq miss him too... well life is just too complicated sometimes... my pain subdued everytime i am with him... i don't know why... maybe because i have been spending alot of time with him and i feel a sense of security and peace with him... just like when i was with azahar...

yesterday, i really had a lot of fun... i felt so happy.... this was the first time i had this kind of fun eversince azahar's death... ashiq really have been there for me... i still remember a time when i was really depressed about azahar's death and tried so many time to end my life, ashiq took care of me, he always call me whenever he can to ensure that i am not lonely and i am coping fine... and i know he is not doing it just because he is my doctor, but because i was his friend.. and not many friends do that for you...