why cant they let me die

Why does it have to be me

To go though this

Why does it have to be me

Who can never show it

I'm crying cant you see

Don't you care about me?

I lock myself in the bathroom

I won't let anybody in

Then I see it

Perfectly sharpend in all its glory

To help me,

Release me

Let me be free

I take it in my hand

Gripping it tightley

Pointing it carfully at my wrist

Im going to do this

I close my eyes

Count to 5

A sudden pain

Releases,

I feel it trickling

I look at it

It's not to deep,

but deep enough

To feel

To know

I'm real

I'm released

And I'm not hurt

Not in the least bit

Then I sit

Once again

Looking,

Thinking

About what I have just done

Just accomplished

A small frown appears on my face

Not enough

A tear takes place

Makes its jouney to my wrist

Stings,

Burns

The pain

Too slow

I get up and look at my ugly face in the mirrior

And Scream

HOW COULD ANYONE EVEN WANT ME!!!!!

I'm ending this mistake

This mistake thats me,

my life

I'm fed up with life

I hold the knife to my throat

I thought it's a few seconds of pain

or the rest of my life

I make one final slice

My last words are

Good-bye thanks for all the pain and misery!

But it didn't end

i open my eyes to see myself in bed

was i dreaming?

i looked at my wrist,

bandaged.

i felt my throat

bandaged.

i look around me

all i saw is me and an empty furnished room

i stepped out of bed and towards the door

i turned the knod

as i pull the door open

i tried to hear for voices

voices of people i know

silence

thats all i hear

not even the sound of cricket

i sat at my bed

for hours

waiting

for a soul to come in

it was then i came in believe that

i am all alone

because

they dont give a damn about me

but what i dont understand

why cant they let me die??